I started to cycling to work again this week. The reasons why I haven’t done this for three years come under the Too Much Information category so I will not discuss them here. Suffice it to say that it wasn’t lack of motivation but forces beyond my control.
Things I quickly remembered:
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Pedestrians are lethal. Stay away from them at all costs. They are deaf, dumb, blind, stupid, suicidal sheep. I know this because I am one and I am as guilty as anybody else of crossing the road with my ears rather than my eyes. Ladies and gentlemen: bikes don't make a noise. Look before you step into the road.
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Car doors should be banned. I was once cycling behind somebody who rode into a car door that somebody flung open in front of him. I will never forget (although I would like to) both the sound and sight of the impact and of body parts doing things they weren't designed to do. Planners who mark cycle lanes next to parked cars should have their limbs snapped. Ignore the cycle lane and occupy road space like the vehicle you are.
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Don't be bullied. Drivers will shout, gesticulate and sound their horns if they think you are delaying their journey by a few seconds. Be a generous and thoughtful road user but never, never, never do that at the expense of your own safety. There is only one loser in a cycle accident whoever is at fault. Don't give the bastards an even break.
Does that sound angry? I used to be an angry cyclist but I’m trying to be a lot calmer this time round. There are more bikes on the road than there used to be and I think drivers are a bit more used to them. I try to remember to acknowledge any good driving. So far it’s working. I am arriving out of breath and a bit warm but not nearly so cross as I used to.
And now I have a blog to vent my frustration with. Lucky you, reader, you can look forward to some Slightly Annoyed Cyclist anecdotes in the next few months.